Real Life Example
Of How To Avoid A Flake
Today I'm back with the second part of the text message/date fuck up report
odyssey. Try saying that 5 times fast...
We left with me calling Miss Newsie Hat to set up the date. When I called I
followed my basic phone game structure, and set up a date for drinks the
So she calls me the next day and tells me that she forgot she had plans with
a friend of hers who's only in town for a few days. I call her and tell her
it's no big deal and we can totally reschedule. The key with handling flakes
like this one is being completely unreactive, but letting the girl know you
do like her and want to see her.
She then texts me:
MNH: I don't know if we are going now.
Sinn: Well if you're not I want to see you!
This is a big statement of intent! I'm letting her know I want to see her.
There's a major difference between wanting to see a girl and needing a girl
to feel better about yourself. I never worry about being try hard or needy,
I worry about getting girls on dates.
MNH: Ok we're not gonna do it tonight.
Sinn: Ok , so you wanna collect your cookies? Or trade your cookies
for an adult libation...
This is callback humor, earlier we had made a bet about what some stupid
movie was about. She won. I love making bets with girls that lead to dates,
no matter who wins. I learned this technique from the TV show "Seinfeld." I
had bet her a batch of homemade cookies.
MNH: Yes. Let's make it cocktails. I'm not a huge cookie person.
Sinn: Cool meet me at X bar at 8:30.
This is what you have to do when setting up a date over text. You must send
a direct command at some point to get her to commit.
MNH: What happened to you going to Y bar?
I had told her I was meeting other friends later that night. I did this to
social proof myself so it didn't look like I would be sitting at home alone
if she flaked.
Sinn: I'd rather see you. Plus if you're as cool as you seem, we
might be able to do "the plan"
Again more callback humor, this refers to how I seed my date by saying I
have a crazy fun plan but need an awesome girl to do it with. I also let her
know I like her.
MNH: I'm definitely down for the plan but it will have to be another
night. I have to take my mom to the airport really early in the morning.
Now some people would see this as a problem. I just assume it's true and
that she'll stay as late as she's having fun. So I don't argue or bring too
much attention to it. She ended up spending the night and leaving at 9 AM.
Sinn: Just a quick drink then...
I could have added more humor here by saying something like " WE'll see how
you do after the half hour evaluation." But that's ok, sometimes you don't
need to do anything except get her committed to meeting up.
MNH: Sure can we do 9?
Sinn: Sounds good, call me when you're outside X bar.
X bar happens to be in my apartment building. So instead of telling her to
meet me at my place, which she could object to, I have her meet me somewhere
more innocuous sounding. I also give her another instruction. The more
instructions she follows the more compliance is built. The more compliance
is built, the more likely she is to comply later to a bigger request like
"Get on your knees.
So now she shows up. I always pretend to "forget my wallet" so we have to go
back up into my apartment where she can get comfortable.
On the date I made 3 major mistakes which lead to her spending the night,
but not consummating the relationship
I'll tell you guys all about the mistakes I made and how to avoid them next
PS- 2 guys got laid at the first 12 Months to Mastery Bootcamp last
weekend in Vegas. Stay tuned to the list and the blog for updates on
everyone in the program!
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